Today is Valentine’s day! A sweet day to celebrate love. The thing is, many people see it as a day to show love to their significant other only. Those who are single on this holiday have a bit of a rough time. I want to share something with those who are single… it’s great being able to show the people who are in your life that you care! I have learned that I do not need a boyfriend or a significant other to celebrate V day. But I didn’t always think this…
I have a little confession to make…. I am 20 years old and have never had a boyfriend! *drop the mic* *gasp*
It’s true! I have remained single for 2 decades. Over the years, people I have met always have a different reaction to this. Some say, “Good for you!”, while others say, “Why? Do you not believe in love?”. I have also been asked if I wanted to be lonely for the rest of my life. My answer is: “Thank you, but no.” Let me explain…
Now the reasoning behind all of this, as I am sure you are wondering, is simply my choice. When I was younger, my parents knew that their kids belonged to the almighty and that they had to raise us in a way that honored God. So they did.
First and foremost, they taught us that Christ loves us so much that He died for us. That’s a special kind of love; a sacrificial love. No one will ever be able to love me like Christ loves me. He always forgives, He always gives grace, He always bestows mercy upon me…
Another thing they taught us is that we, as humans, possess a precious gift of love. This love is something that God programs into our intricate lives. The love is something that is to be dispersed throughout the world. We are to give love to those around us, especially to those who are hard to love.
At some time in life, a human will enter that make us feel a different kind of love. Not a love like Christ gives us, or like the love of a Father or Mother. This kind of love is something that happens between us and another person. It’s something that can never be completely explained. Your whole being is consumed by a feeling you are not familiar with. And what’s crazy is that some people experience this kind of love multiple times.
Love is something that should not be taken lightly. God created us to love deeply and to care deeply. As humans, we want to feel like we belong. Whether that is to a person or to a thing, belonging is a huge motivator to continue on in life. For those who do not know the love of God, they look for that fulfillment and belonging somewhere else. The greatest peace and belonging that will ever be found is in the forgiving arms of Jesus Christ.
For me, I believe all this to be true. My parents had encouraged me from a young age to save my special love for someone until I knew that God had put that person in my life to stay forever.
I always thought that at some point I may try to have a boyfriend and see what that is like. When I was 16, I wanted to date really badly. I had been working a lot and the people I was working a lot with were guys. A few I knew really well and got along with. I knew that part of me was feeling good from all the attention I was getting from them. Another part of me knew that the guys I worked with would never be the ones to stay around. They were all used to trivial relationships and none of them were Christians.
Sometime later, after having a little heartbreak from realizing that I could never date any of them because I cannot do trivial things, I made a promise to myself. I had decided at the age of 17 that I would never date anyone. I would never court anyone either. God had given me life, saved me, and had forgiven me of all my sins. I came to the conclusion that if He could do all that, then surely He had the power to place the man I would marry in my life when I was ready.
When I did that, my whole life changed. I saw things differently. I couldn’t act the same anymore either. While it was difficult to try and not think about my guy friends in romantic ways, I found it more enjoyable to just be friends with them. I also began to learn how to love my family even more. I started to really understand what it meant to love people. I began to be blessed by God to have friends who I learned to love as well. I saw my guy friends as brothers rather than potential dates. In my mind, I was giving them more respect as humans, instead of seeing them as players in my game of life.
You see, if I had dated way back then, I would have not been able to understand the real meaning of love. I would have been dating to satisfy my own wants and desires, rather than God’s desires for me. I treasure love now. I know now that love is something that is special. Something that should be given once, if possible. If I trust God with my life than I trust God with my whole life.
So, now on Valentine’s day, I try to remember that maybe one day I will be able to celebrate love with someone special. Until then, I am going to continue to grow in the Lord and love those around me. I will be content, by the grace of God, to wait until I can give my special love to someone. I first want to love those around me every moment I am given. I want to serve God until I go home to be with Him.
Love suffers long and is kind; love does not envy; love does not parade itself, is not puffed up; does not behave rudely, does not seek its own, is not provoked, thinks no evil; does not rejoice in iniquity, but rejoices in the truth; bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never fails. But whether there are prophecies, they will fail; whether there are tongues, they will cease; whether there is knowledge, it will vanish away.”
-1 Corinthians 13:4-8
And the second, like it, is this: ‘You shall love your neighbor as yourself.’There is no other commandment greater than these.”
Soli Deo Gloria